***I told Moise recently that his mechanic friend Doctor Joe is great.  Moise says he’s crazy.  Both are 100% true Moise and don’t need to contradict each other (you can be both great and crazy).  Today’s Friday Email is all about “Contradictions.” Have a great weekend!***

We all come across plenty of contradictions.  Sometimes we even contradict ourselves.  Someone told me that I’ve become more like Moise.  I said that’s a good thing and they said no you’ve only taken on his bad characteristics.  Wait there’s bad things about Moise?  I never knew that.  Sounds like a contradiction to me.  Moise told me to slow down when I was driving.  I asked why?  He said I don’t want you to get a ticket and put in the Friday Email that Moise made you get a ticket.  How would I blame you, Moise?  You told me to slow down, but I told me to speed up so I can’t blame you or that would be a total contradiction.  Abby told me she will invite me to a party she’s having with all her friends.  This looked like news to Moise and contradicting what he was planning.  Joshua and Abby’s neighbor came over to play with bikes.  There’s a total of 4 bikes available but only 3 kids to use them and somehow, they’re fighting over it.  That math contradicts my logic of 4 not being enough for 3.  Abby told me my car is her car.  I pulled out my insurance and showed her my name on it.  That contradicts your statement from earlier, Abby.  Everyone thinks AI will take over everything, but it won’t.  I called to talk to customer service.  This robot refused to let me.  The robot asked if they could help me.  I said no you can’t.  I answered the robot’s question and then what they replied with didn’t apply to what I’m asking about.  A contradiction.  Moise was in a PDF file (we thought) and nobody could open it.  Close it Moise.  He says I can’t open it.  Close it Moise.  He says I can’t open it.  How can I close it if I can’t open it, he says?  I guess that is a contradiction (and that means he didn’t have it open to begin with oops).  Junior almost dropped a whole can of sugar in the kitchen but caught it on his leg.  Impressive.  Maybe Junior and athletic aren’t total contradictions like I’ve always thought.  Moise said to me Junior isn’t in a good mood (but hadn’t even spoken to him yet).  I said Moise, he is in a good mood, I talked to him.  Moise says I don’t feel it.  Maybe that contradiction you’re feeling is because of you Moise and your effect on his mood.  Moise asked what a dog panting noise sounds like in the heat, so I did a dog panting noise.  It’s not going to contradict my professionalism (I already do that every Friday in this email).  Moise was washing his car in his driveway with his assistant Joshua.  He told me to pull up my car, and I got a free carwash.  I let Junior know about this great free service.  Moise said no Junior must pay for it.  I guess the service is a contradiction of being free for some people and not free for others.  Now when it comes to doing your timesheet, just remember I never contradict myself when I ask you to do it on Fridays all the time.  Please do your timesheet on time today and remember if you want a free car service just go to Moise’s driveway and if he likes you enough, you’ll get it for free but if not, you’re going to be handed a bill like Junior will be.

Have a great weekend!

Anthony