Conversations

Posted on July 25, 2025 by broodjets

***When I have a conversation with Joshua or Abby sometimes I feel like I can relate to them better than to most adults I have conversations with (I wonder if that says something about me or just the fact they are way beyond their years.  Today’s Friday Email is all about Conversations.  Have a great weekend!***

We all have various conversations on a daily basis (sometimes with people we like to have them with and other times with people we would prefer to avoid like the plague).  I told Moise recently ever notice Junior talks nice to everyone except for us when having a conversation?  Junior asked if we’re jealous.  Yes, I am.  I had a conversation with a robot on Amazon.  I ordered chocolate and it arrived all melted.  I criticized the company for sending it without any cooling packets in the box.  The robot told me he would give me a refund.  I’m still waiting Mr. Robot.  Proof that robots can’t replace humans.  I heard Junior having a conversation on the phone.  Is that Moise?  Nah…oh wait he’s getting mad.  Then I hear Junior say “Moise.” I knew it.  I told Moise to ask Junior something.  He said I did and I just got a lecture (not a conversation).  Junior’s internet company called him to have a conversation with him to tell him he had no internet. That’s classy.  Know how I know when I don’t have internet?  I try to log on and it says no internet access.  Guess I need a new internet provider.  Moise read the Friday Email last week and asked me how I knew he got a new phone.  You told me in a conversation Moise.  Oh I tell you my whole life.  Yes and it fascinates me.  Moise asked do you want to see my new phone?  Sure.  Looks big and heavy…easier for Abby to drop Moise.  Sometimes I pick M&Ms out of my trail mix and don’t eat them proportionally with the other items in it.  I go to Junior with my trail mix bag in hand and begin a conversation.  Junior can I take the M&Ms out of your trail mix because I’m running short on them towards the bottom of my bag.  You pick them out, he asks and says you’re such a child.  Abby says Anthony do u want coffee. I said I’m ok I have water. She says yes or no. Abby wants a straight answer from me not a whole conversation not answering her question. Moise and I were putting up a bar in his closet so that he can put his clothes which are on hangers on it.  Moise started a conversation asking if I’m going to put this in the Friday Email.  I said it depends.  On what he says?  I said if after we put the bar up and the clothes on it the entire thing collapses it will definitely be in the Friday Email.  (Update: The bar hasn’t fallen “yet” but we only put half the clothes that he had on it because we felt if we put anymore it was going to fall because it’s not really sturdy the way we installed it).  Junior started a conversation because of a story he saw where police offered a 10K reward if you turned in this criminal they were looking for.  The criminal called the police and said he is turning himself in so please have the 10K ready for him.  The police said they can’t give him the 10K.  I wonder if he just hung up then?  The more we thought about it though the more we started to rationalize that we think the guy is owed the 10K.  Now when it comes to doing your timesheet just remember we don’t need to have a conversation over it if you just do it on Friday.  Please do your timesheet on time today and remember if you turn yourself into the timesheet police for not doing it you’re not getting 10K from me.

Have a great weekend!

Anthony

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24-7

Posted on July 18, 2025 by broodjets

***Sometimes I think I annoy Junior 24-7 but then I realize I do need time to sleep (although that probably annoys him about me too). Today’s Friday Email is all about 24-7. Have a great weekend!***

We like the convenience of someone being available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.  Last weekend I was typing on my computer (actually it was probably the Friday Email) and Damian started barking at me.  I said just a minute Damie.  But he didn’t want to wait.  He grabbed the sunglasses I had on my desk and ran away with them.  I chased after him (can’t have him breaking those “expensive” $20 sunglasses).  Damian demands attention 24-7 and if it’s not given it, he will take it.  Moise asks me a simple question.  Instead of answering his simple question, I ask him 3 questions about his simple question.  Moise said, “Why do you complicate my life (24-7)?”  Um because it’s more fun than simplifying it?  Moise was off one day recently and called me after work.  He asked me how Junior was today.  I said he was in a good mood.  Really?  Moise was surprised.  Why Moise?  You weren’t there and when you are your goal is to bother him 24-7 so what do you expect?  Junior was talking about 24-7 fitness gyms.  I get some people have weird schedules but what kind of people are you going to meet in a gym at 3AM?  Well I know Junior isn’t there at 3AM. Moise asked me a question.  I said ask Junior that question not me.  He says Junior will go crazy.  That’s why I want you to ask him Moise (24-7 my first thought is will Junior get mad at it than yes let’s do it).  Junior was saying how it’s important to enjoy your life.  Very true.  24-7.  So I had to stop his speech and ask him.  Aren’t you enjoying it with me and Moise?  One word answer “No.”  He just doesn’t want to admit he is.  Moise said his dad was not happy about something.  I asked did he give you a speech?  What do you think, Moise said?  I’ve heard them before firsthand.  His dad can 24-7 give speeches (award winning ones too).  Moise said he was going to bring his broken phone (thanks to little Abby) to get fixed. I told him Moise nobody going to fix that trash (not even a 24-7 phone fixing store).  He said well I got a new one but the old one I like better.  You mean broken, cracked, and dirty?  Junior told me that I wouldn’t do something for him but for Moise I would.  How do you know Junior?  He says since he introduced me to Moise I should be indebted to him (24-7).  It’s like someone playing matchmaker and then the 2 people fall in love (24-7…at least at the start).  I told Moise that I’m going to the car wash.  There is something really stuck to my windshield that won’t come off and I’ve been using lots of the windshield washer fluid he gave me to get it off but it still won’t come off.  He says no don’t be using that!  Get to the car wash!  Afraid I may ask you to replenish it for me soon?  Is it a requirement to tip car wash people?  Junior says I do because I’m not cheap.  They didn’t even get the spot out that I wanted.  Do I have to tip everyone 24-7 if they don’t do a good job?  Now when it comes to doing your timesheet just remember it may seem like I’m asking you to do your timesheet 24-7 but it’s really only once a week.  Please do your timesheet on time today and remember if you go to a car wash and they don’t clean the car correctly you are not obligated to tip them (no matter what Junior says)

Have a great weekend!
Anthony

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Saving vs. Spending

Posted on July 11, 2025 by broodjets

***I’d like to save some of the nice summer weather and spend it in the winter (when we’re freezing and slipping on ice).  Today’s Friday Email is all about Saving vs. Spending. Have a great weekend!***

We are all consistently battling the decision of saving vs. spending.  In reality, it’s good to do both but sometimes you have to make those tough decisions.  For instance, if Damian wants a new toy I get it for him because I’d rather spend money on him than save it (until he rips it up in 1 minute and then I wonder why I spent $10 on that toy).  I was trying to get crumbs out of my keyboard but the keyboard spray just wasn’t doing the job so I took a scissor and tried to yank out the crumbs (without yanking out the keys of the keyboard).  I asked Junior does he think it’s ok to use this method?  He saved the time of responding, shook his head, and walked away from me.  Moise asked me how I was feeling when the a/c wasn’t working.  I said like a Million Bucks (just a hot sweaty million bucks).  Sales call “Hi this is so and so how are you?” I simply groaned plenty loud to get my point across and offered a very insincere “fine how are you?” Save both our time by not calling me anymore.  Moise was trying to figure something out.  I told him to save his time and Google it.  He’s not happy with my response.  Why?  I google everything (even what to eat for breakfast).  Google runs my life.  Suddenly he starts googling (he always listens to me eventually…even when I wind up steering him wrong).  Moise told me he’s 95% sure of something but not 100% sure of it.  Moise, to me if you are 95% sure of something you might as well be 10% sure of it.  It’s the same thing (if you’re not 100% sure then I don’t trust you).  Moise was trying to show off to Joshua and Abby how he was jumping off this huge 3 foot cliff (step would be more appropriate for how “not” high this was). He had to spend 30 seconds of his time to show them how he can jump off it.  Moise keeps driving past gas stations trying to save a few pennies but he says he needs gas.  Abby sitting in the back seat keeps seeing Moise drive by gas stations.  When he stops for gas Abby says “Finally.” Those pennies he saved on cheaper gas will go into your college fund little Abby.  Moise sees me getting in my car at work and says do you still need windshield washer fluid?  Yes why you think I keep mentioning it (including in the Friday Email).  He opens a brand new bottle from his car.  I said Moise just a little I don’t want this in the Friday Email that I owe you windshield washer fluid.  Of course you owe me he says!  Oh…I thought it was free and you were saving me money.  He says $25 for the bottle.  I told Junior that Moise gave me some windshield washer fluid.  Junior says I can’t believe you gave him windshield washer fluid Moise.  I didn’t give it to him Moise says.  I invested in him.  If I’m an investment, I hope that I don’t crash like I’ve seen some stocks in the stock market crash at times.  Now when it comes to doing your timesheet just remember if you spend a few minutes to do it each week carefully you’ll save yourself the time of having to do it again (and again).  Please do your timesheet on time today and remember if you are short on windshield washer fluid, Moise has it readily available and is willing to share (possibly for the right price).

Have a great weekend!

                                                                                                                                      Anthony

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Juggling

Posted on July 4, 2025 by broodjets

***With the holiday you’re probably juggling in your mind what day today is.  Well today’s Friday Email is all about “Juggling.” Have a great weekend!***

We’re all trying to juggle different things in our lives.  When I was a kid and stayed at my grams house I would juggle her fruit.  Apples, pears, whatever I could find.  2, 3, maybe even 4.  Eventually the fruit would hit the floor, and she’d yell at me.  I guess my grams never heard the saying “practice makes perfect” (and dented apples).  If she had let me continue this routine I might have grown up to make her proud and become a professional juggler.  I guess I kind of am juggling timesheets, so there’s that for symmetry.  This lady sees Damian at the park and starts playing with him (at times it looked like she was trying to juggle him since he was all over her).  Then she shows me scratches she got on her arms from playing with him.  She said well I asked for it.  I said yes you did.  Another person saw Damian approaching and started to say “In my past life I was a cat person” so I immediately yanked Damian back thinking this guy does not like dogs.  He then continued “Until I met a Boston Terrier.” I think this guy was just juggling with Damian and my emotions.  Junior texted me the day he got back from vacation asking why are you off the day I get back?  What Junior are you juggling your emotions of wanting to see me that badly you can’t wait 1 extra day?  Abby called me and I heard Moise in the background yell “Abby no why are you calling Anthony?” Because Abby wants to talk to me Moise.  Or maybe she’s just playing with (and juggling) your phone like she normally does (which is why you desperately need a new one now).  We called Junior and he just left the gym saying he was using the treadmill.  I am pretty sure that treadmill was set on the slowest setting (maybe Junior was juggling apples while on the treadmill multitasking).  Abby gave me a birthday card, and it had a picture of a doggie on it.  She said this is your new doggie.  Abby, I already can barely take care of Damian you think I want a second dog?  I can’t juggle dogs (or kids) as easily as I can juggle fruit.  I texted Junior on his way to work and asked him if he had windshield washer fluid with him that I could use.  He says what do you think I look like?  I said the type of guy who keeps spare windshield washer fluid in his car.  Moise says he has windshield washer fluid in his car if I want it.  How nice.  But a few days later when I was still going on about it, he now says for $25 I can have it.  Moise juggling the price from $0 to $25 in just a few days.  That’s some inflation.  Now when it comes to doing your timesheet, I don’t want you to juggle (and struggle) with doing it.  I just want it to be as easy as possible.  Please do your timesheet on time today and remember if you are in desperate need for windshield washer fluid Moise’s price has (as of the time of this writing) probably inflated to $50 for one bottle.
Have a great weekend!

Anthony

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Jealousy

Posted on June 27, 2025 by broodjets

***Everyone in the winter was jealous of people who lived in warmer climates. But this week we all were complaining that it’s way too hot. Make up your minds people. Today’s Friday Email is all about Jealousy. Have a great weekend!***

We all have been jealous in the past of someone.  I’m sure you may be jealous you don’t get to directly work with Moise.  You might even be jealous that you don’t get to hear Junior’s singing voice (until you actually heard it and then your jealousy would be cured immediately).  Maybe you’re jealous that you can’t chase dozens (and dozens) of  employees every week like I do for their timesheets (highly unlikely).  Last week the only way I could get Abby to chill out was to hand over my phone to her while she randomly clicked on stuff.  I am jealous at how a 3-year-old knows how to use a phone better than I do (I was just praying she would not drop it, or her daddy would have to pay for it).  I told Junior do not worry Moise is on his way.  He looked up at the sky (not out of jealousy but out of bewilderment) and asked why would he care about Moise?  He said I have better things to worry about (apparently, I don’t).  Junior was telling me about someone he knows who is the life of the party.  I said oh like me?  He said not really, you’re shyer than they are.  I am jealous they are more appealing to you than I am Junior but when you mention being shy, I’m not very shy about making fun of you in the Friday Email am I?  I told Moise I haven’t seen Joshua or Abby in a couple of weeks.  He said soon you won’t be their uncle if this keeps up.  It made me jealous, and I made sure I went to see them the next day.  Junior said he had a dream about me and that I came to live near him.  This is right after he recently told me he wants to follow me around for a week to see my routines and what I do.  Moise said this is getting weird.  Maybe Moise is getting jealous of Junior dreaming about me.  Moise told me that a hug from Abby is a gift for me.  True who wouldn’t be jealous of getting a hug from Abby (but she can only reach my kneecaps Moise).  I asked Moise if he’d be home on a Saturday I was coming over.  He said he will be home because his brother is coming over.  I said good I like him.  He’s cool.  Moise said,  what about me.  I sensed a little bit of jealousy. Moise asked Abby to count to 10 (and she did very successfully).  But then she kept going and went to 18 and 90.  I am jealous of Abby’s speed counting.  We called Junior and asked him if he missed us since he was on vacation.  He said not even an ounce.  Maybe that’s because he missed us a whole gallon instead?  Moise asked Junior how his vacation was, and he said it was great until we called him and ruined it.  Moise said that’s what we do.  Moise and I were putting something together at his house (well attempting to we rarely ever finish the job successfully) and he said what’s the next step.  I read step 2 to him.  He says we’re already on step 4!  Oh, I’m jealous Moise of you apparently skipping past steps 2 and 3 and going right to 4 (no wonder we weren’t successful again).  Now when it comes to doing your timesheet just remember that you should be jealous of the people who do it every single Friday.  Please do your timesheet on time today and remember if you ever feel jealous of Moise and my handy skills don’t because we don’t have much. 
Have a great weekend!

Anthony

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Responses

Posted on June 20, 2025 by broodjets

***If you ask me if I miss Junior this week since he’s on vacation my response would be “Of course.” Whether that’s true or not is up to you to decipher.  Today’s Friday Email is all about “Responses.” Have a great weekend!***

Questions can be interesting, but Responses can be far more entertaining.  Someone told me that they liked my car.  I responded, “It’s old?” She said she likes 2 door cars.  Luckily, she didn’t see the inside of it Damian’s seat with dog hair on it.  I got a new water bottle.  I realized that when I drink it and get to the end it leaves about half an inch at the bottom of water because the straw does not reach the bottom of the bottle.  Moise response is when you buy cheap stuff that’s what you get.  Moise told me I like to put gas on fire with my responses to things.  It’s already burning he said.  Let the fire burn.  I’m just helping to accelerate the fire Moise.  When Moise is mad he’ll start rambling, asking questions and responding/answering them himself before you get a chance to respond to him.  I messaged Moise on teams and he didn’t respond so I wrote a “HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOOO” to try to get his attention (update he still didn’t respond).  Moise was typing an email response to someone and was trying to use the shortcut like you’re typing “Happy”, and the next word pops up like “Birthday” and you skip past it, so it already types it for you.  But instead, when Moise typed Happy and tried to skip past the next word it typed “Holiday Season.”  Umm probably not the appropriate response in June Moise.  Damian got a runner to stop when she saw him approaching her.  She said Hello little Boston Terrier.  Do you want to say Hi to me or rip my face off?  His response was to jump and play with her (if this was my previous Boston Terrier Rollins the response would be rip your face off).  I asked Junior if he ever has issues with his shoelaces not being even.  You realize one side is too long and the other side is too short.  He responded, “Don’t they teach you that in Kindergarten?” No Junior they just taught me how to tie the shoes not make the laces even (that was an advanced course in tying shoes).  I was trying to fix something on word with margins.  I said out loud (just loud enough so Moise would hear me) that I’d ask Moise but I know he won’t know how to do this.  He responded trust me sometimes I know things you don’t know (side note he didn’t know how to fix the margins the way I wanted them when he attempted to do it).  Junior greeted me to start the week with “Just so you know…” and as he started off that way I’m thinking he’s going to say it’s nice to see you or I like your shirt or something to that effect but instead I got the response of “this coffee you made tastes horrible.” There was a bug in the kitchen at work.  Junior responded I got this.  He got a cup and reached up and held it against the wall.  Uh now what Junior was my response?  Stand like that for the next 24 hours till it runs out of air?  He said just get me a napkin so he could hold it against the cup and let it outside.  Well done Junior you figured out how to overcome a dangerous bug.  Now when it comes to doing your timesheet my response is please do it today no exceptions.  Please do your timesheet on time today and remember if you need a bug removed holding a cup against the wall for 24 hours straight until it runs out of air is probably not the best method to use as Junior realized.

Have a great weekend!

Anthony

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What’s Up Doc

Posted on June 13, 2025 by broodjets

***Moise always told me he could be a doctor because they ask such simple questions like “Can you see me, and can you breathe?” (I think they’re slightly more qualified than you are Moise).  Today’s Friday Email is all about “What’s up Doc.” Have a great weekend!***

Bugs Bunny famous saying is “What’s Up Doc?” Well, I wanted to ask, “What’s Up Dunkin?” When I saw this $7 “sandwich” they gave me.  It looked like it was for Joshua or Abby (a little kid wouldn’t even be full on this tiny sandwich).  And then I find mustard on it.  Yuck.  That’s one reason I won’t eat hot dogs is I hate mustard.  Why would I want mustard on ham?  One thing I can never understand is people who wear hoodies with shorts.  Like is it cold or is it warm?  You can’t be both.  What’s up with that?  Moise ran out of paper so instead of going to the back to get a new one he started taking paper out of Junior’s printer.  If Junior sees this Moise he’s going to ask you what’s up with that you paper thief?  I told Abby to eat for me.  She said no.  I told her to eat for the doggie, and she ate right away.  What’s up with you loving Damian more than me now Abby?  Abby gave me her toy phone and instructed me to hold it but not to talk on it.  Ok boss.  I helped Abby drive to the store for donuts (aka the end of her driveway) but they were magically out of donuts (we should have asked the store what’s up with that?) and we drove all the way back home up her driveway (imagine if your work commute was that far).  Moise was scrolling down on his excel sheet.  Junior says scroll up.  Moise keeps scrolling down.  I said how about you scroll the opposite of down Moise?  Are you trying to annoy Junior by doing the opposite of what he was asking?  If so, what’s up with that?  Moise said he was fine until he met me.  What’s up with that accusation and what are you insinuating Moise?  Moise showed me this website we use for work.  I kept clicking nonstop on stuff.  He got annoyed and said you just keep clicking (instead of listening to his instructions on how to get to where we needed to go).  I heard this really weird (bad?) noise from across our office last week.  What’s up with that?  Then I realized it was Junior singing to himself.  I asked Moise do you hear that?  He just started laughing.  Later that day Junior asked me to take something seriously that he was telling me about.  I said Junior after hearing you sing earlier; I can’t take anything you say seriously for the rest of the day.  He said you guys heard me singing.  I said we all did unfortunately.  Ever try out for that show America’s Got (No) Talent?  I was standing next to Junior and Moise says you just want to smell his cheap cologne.  Junior took offense and said trust me this cologne is not cheap Moise. Junior told me he would be a good doctor.  He said some doctors give you medicine to help you while others give you medicine to harm you.  Umm ok what’s up with that?  He then asks me if he can take this medicine after drinking coffee.  You’re the doctor Junior.  Why are you asking me for my advice?  Now when it comes to doing your timesheet just remember when I call you on Monday it’s not to say what’s up (even though I will say that).  It’s to say why didn’t you do your timesheet?  Please do your timesheet on time today and remember if you need to see a doctor I recommend anyone other than Junior.

Have a great weekend!

Anthony

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Original

Posted on June 6, 2025 by broodjets

***Sometimes I have the original idea to do (or say) something to make Junior not happy with me. Ok that’s not so original (It’s a daily occurrence sometimes caused by simple existence). Today’s Friday Email is all about “Original.” Have a great weekend!***

Being yourself makes you an original.  I always wondered if cops give tickets a lot less often on rainy days.  It might not be the most original idea as some people probably have wondered the same.  I saw a guy clearly slide through a stop sign.  He stopped like 30 feet after it.  The cop sitting there at the stop sign waiting to pull someone over just ignored it.  I told Junior I’d buy him lunch one day.  He laughed and said when is the last time you bought me lunch?  I was doing the math in my head and thinking hmm what year was Covid and then I was going back several months…umm years before that.  I guess it was an original idea to buy Junior lunch.  He said why do you do it when Moise isn’t here today?  Uh Junior it’s 1 less person to buy it for.  Junior said he was going outside to get some sun (sun that would be original lately based on the weather we’ve had).  I look out the window and see absolutely nothing but dark clouds.  Uhh Junior are you going to Miami to get that sun? Junior was looking for his glasses (original he misplaced them).  The problem is when you aren’t wearing your glasses, and you need to find your glasses you usually need to wear the glasses to find those glasses Junior. Abby told me to sit down on her little kid’s chair.  Original idea for a grown person to sit on that tiny little kids chair Abby.  Moise comes to me with his empty tape dispenser.  I know you did this, he says.  What are you accusing me of using the tape and leaving it empty Moise?  I mean I do use your tape all the time because I don’t have one (so part of your original accusation of me using your tape is accurate)…but it’s been on your desk empty for months.  Moise sees my phone charger plugged in.  He says he needs one to charge his phone.  I told him, Moise, ” I don’t think my phone charger is going to work in that 20-year-old (original) phone you use.”  Moise was trying to put this little sprinkler/pool together for the kids.  I was assisting him (instantly you know this wasn’t going to go well).  The original idea was let the kids have fun in water during the summer.  Attempt #1 We get an air pump and start pumping air to inflate the little kid’s pool.  Moise stops and says this is not right what we’re doing.  Attempt #2 Moise starts blowing air into this pool himself.  Some people say I’m full of hot air but if Moise kept blowing air into this pool for the next 12 hours (until he passed out) he may have been able to get the pool inflated to about 5% capacity (and that’s being kind).  Attempt #3 We inflated the pool with water.  It worked.  Like a sprinkler coming out of the pool holes.  But now you have to keep the water running nonstop.  Moise says this is going to run up quite a water bill.  Well, you should have stuck to your original thought and pumped air into the pool instead then.  Who needs water in a pool anyway?  Now when it comes to doing your timesheet just remember the original idea is to do it on Fridays.  Please do your timesheet on time today and remember if you try to blow air into something and are about to pass out before it’s even 1% full you’re probably doing something wrong.

Have a great weekend!

Anthony

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Opposites Attract

Posted on May 30, 2025 by broodjets

***I wish for once it wouldn’t rain on a weekend, but I guess my wish is attracting the opposite since Mother Nature seems to want to make it rain all the time this spring.  Today’s Friday Email is all about “Opposites Attract”.  Have a great weekend!***

Normally the belief among many people is that “Opposites Attract.”  I printed something on letterhead for Moise but I put the paper in the printer the wrong way, so it came out upside down and scanned it to him without noticing.  He wasn’t happy.  Maybe I subconsciously thought opposites would attract and he’d be ok with reading something upside down.  I said, well my life is upside down.  He agreed.  I was walking with Moise’s nephew and Damian along this long path straight forward.  I told him let’s turn around.  He said no it’s too far to turn around.  But if we keep walking farther it’s going to be longer because we eventually have to turn around to go back.  I guess he did not think that turning the opposite way would attract us being closer to home.  He saw someone laying on the floor at the park and told me don’t let Damian jump on them. I said last time I gave you the leash isn’t that exactly what you let happen?   He said Damian didn’t listen to him.  A stubborn Boston Terrier telling them to do something attracts them to do the opposite of what you tell them to do.  I told Moise I was bringing Damian to the park and making sure I had some water for him.  He said what about me and the kids.  Fine, I’ll bring some for you.  He asked clean water?  I said no sewer water.  When you attract the idea of wanting clean water you might wind up with the opposite. Junior was finishing up a bag of chips and was dumping the bag upside down in his mouth to get every last crumb out of it.  Well, you can’t blame a guy for getting every bit of his money’s worth, I guess.  Junior was talking to me about highly educated people. I said so like me, right?  He just laughed.  I got the opposite of the reaction I was trying to attract.  Moise told me to push Abby on her bike.  We were flying.  He said you are moving way too fast.  Maybe she asked me to show her how I drive Moise.  I didn’t do the opposite and push her slow.  Moise had a code sent to the Accounting Email.  He asks me to read it for him.  975818.  He’s typing the numbers slowly, so I have to repeat it.  I said do you want me to repeat it backwards (as in the opposite)?  818579.  Repeating the code backwards attracted Moise being angry with me.  He said I know you’re smart you don’t have to prove it.  Smart or smartass?  I told Moise I went to the Yankees/Mets game.  He asked how much it cost. I told him.  He said no way you paid for that ticket.  I said what do you think I’m cheap?  He said we know each other very well.  Junior said he wants to spend one week with me and see everything I do (my routines etc.).  Umm Junior so you basically want to marry me for a week?  If I got married it wouldn’t last a week.  But if I got married to you it wouldn’t last a day.  Now when it comes to doing your timesheet just remember that I’m trying to attract you to do it on time but sometimes I get the opposite of that.  Please do your timesheet on time today and remember if you think opposites always attract then just remember that is not always true as Junior and I prove.

Have a great weekend!

Anthony

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Butter You Up

Posted on May 23, 2025 by broodjets

***When you’re baking you often need to use butter but in life to get something we want we often will butter up people. Today’s Friday Email is all about “Butter You Up.” Have a great weekend!***

Sometimes people will try to “Butter You Up” when they want something.  Junior said to me come here and as I was, he said no don’t come here.  Were you just trying to butter me up Junior and make me think you like me by telling me to come over to you?  I got a sales call, and the guy asks me “Do you remember me from 8 months ago?” I said oh sure you sound so familiar.  Really, he says?  Well, if you couldn’t sense my sarcasm about it just take it as I was simply buttering you up to make you feel special.  I like when Moise gives me a warning.  No, No, No don’t laugh or don’t play like that.  He’s not buttering me up by saying that obviously, but he is just giving me reason to laugh at his warning.  Moise said that the second month of the year is April.  Uh maybe if you say every other month, it’s the 2nd.  Moise needs to brush up (not butter up) his calendar skills.  Moise asked me to heat up his food for 4 minutes.  That sounds like too much time Moise.  What if the microwave blows up?  He says it’s your problem.  Moise was asking me something that is a question you would ask a child.  Moise do you think I’m a child?  He had a long pause…and said well that’s the question I’ve been asking myself for a long time (I guess he’s not buttering me up and saying I’m more mature than kids are).  Junior was trying to figure something out and the way he was going about it claimed that he’s thinking like Moise thinks now.  Umm are you buttering Moise up for being a wise man?  Is that a good thing or bad thing?  Moise said Junior is simply implying criticism of him.  Moise usually drinks coffee out of the pot but never (ever) makes it himself.  He tries to make it (by using the amazing skill of pressing the power button after putting grinds into the filter).  5 seconds later he says it’s not done yet.  Uh Moise it’s not that fast.  Are you trying to butter up the coffee maker thinking it’s a super duper blazing fast special coffee maker?  He put double the coffee you’re supposed to put and says don’t put this in the Friday Email (that’s code for I know you will put this in the Friday Email).  Junior’s week didn’t start off good when he saw his naturally buttered croissant with extra butter on it (like someone dumped a container of it on it).  Junior it looks like you’re still eating a lot of butter in that croissant.  He showed me how much he took off.  Wow.  It looks like a butter sandwich.  Maybe you need to get a second (or third) croissant to spread around all that butter on Junior.  Now when it comes to doing your timesheet just remember I’m not going to butter you up to get you to do it but simply ask you nicely to please do your timesheet on time today and remember if you are handed what is believed to be a croissant (but you can only see butter) just give your extra butter to Junior and he’ll be more than happy to take it from you.

Have a great weekend!

                                                           Anthony                                                            

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